THE TRUTH ISN’T ALWAYS FUNNY. If you want a funny list, we’ve got it. But not here. This time I’m taking on the single, galvanizing not-funny aspect of the sisterhood. And just what is that? Time. How we manage time.
Yeah, sisters, we’re talking time, that hideous topic, that elephant in every room in our homes. And I’m doing it as a “don’t” list, as opposed to all our other TSP lists, taking this by the proverbial horns, and wrestling to the ground some of the things we all sometimes need to say. Please feel free to add, since to date my list is short, and not at all sweet.
I call it “The Big 5: The Please Don’ts” of the Sisterhood.”
Here it is.
1. Don’t tell us again how much you wish we could have been there, wherever it was you wanted us to be. We wish we had been there, too, but our child had a tennis lesson.
2. Don’t tell us we do too much. We know we do too much. But which of the things we do would you have us give up? That thing we do with you, perhaps?
3. Don’t tell us we buy too many books. One can never buy too many books.
4. Don’t tell us we look tired. We prefer to think we look fully engaged.
5. Don’t confuse a blank look with something we want to see. Much of any long-term relationship is pantomime, so get your mime on, honey, and at least look interested.
Anything else on your don’ts, or do those five about cover it?
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Here’s one, and I know I’m going to get the evil-eye from many:
Don’t keep telling me to enjoy every single second of my child’s life, for it goes by so fast and soon they will all be grown up.
(Whether this be true or not, it seems the advice is always given by a parent who has a son/daughter in their 20′s. They have blocked out all the months of sleep deprivation, whining and meltdowns.)
Hey, Amy: No evil eye from me, that’s for certain. Oh, man, the things we tell women to “enjoy.” Such a wonderful addition. Thanks, Amy. And keep coming back, please.
Don’t get angry with us for consistently being ten minutes late.
Sure, I could be late because I decided to make just one more phone call or answer one more email before I ran out to meet you. Or maybe I wanted to look extra nice for you, maybe I changed my outfit one last time to impress you, maybe I was having a bad hair day and spent an extra minute or two obsessing over it in the mirror. Don’t get angry, just tell me I look nice.
I don’t have a “don’t” to add right this minute because I have too much to do this morning (seriously!), but I wanted to drop a note to say I LOVE this list!!
Also have to tell you that when I saw Wonderwoman’s picture – and figured the topic was time (I’m such a bright gal – grin – and it helped that the topic sentence was right there) – I made a speedy assumption that Wonderwoman was multitasking…I’m still grinning – I actually saw the rope as WW’s YARN – figured she was winding wool into a ball…
Oh, Ashley, that’s a goody. Welcome to TSP, especially with such a rich nugget as this. Maybe maybe maybe. Considering the maybes of someone else’s life might make us all a little less stressed. Thank you. And please come back soon.
Hello, Square-Peg Karen. Good for you for just knowing this was about time management, that topic on which maybe (see Ashley, above) we all need to cool down just a notch. We love Wonder Woman, and I, too, would like to see her sit down and knit just once. Just a little. Just for us women. Thanks. And come back soon.
Love number three! If I can check it out at the library first I will; otherwise I’m going to buy books :)
Hey, sister CopyStrands. Lovely, as always, to read you here. Yes, yes. I firmly believe that if our book bills were our largest monthly commitment, this would be a good world, indeed. I’m not always supported in that view, however. But I bet you could tell that, reading between the lines of my little list. Oh yeah. Please come back soon for more.
Don’t forget that I might actually have some useful advice. Don’t let my know-it-all attitude prevent you from asking when, this time, I just might actually know something.
Oh, Cheryl, that’s marvelous. And funny. And oh-so-apt. Thanks so much. Noted for the record. Please come back soon. We enjoy hearing your voice.
Don’t EVER say to me “What you need to do is……”. Very vicious, snarly response. I’m also not real excited about “you care too much, chill.” Don’t do that either.
Thanks for this; it’s a joy to be socially acceptably snarly!
Love this topic. LOVE IT! Another blog I read was talking about super powers and asked what our own personal super power was. I had to ‘fess up and say that I am The Timekeeper.
I can coordinate a schedule down to the millisecond if I have to and make sure that everyone is “motivated” to “fall in line and be on time”.
Roadchick’s Don’t:
Don’t tell me to take care of it (whatever “it” is, be it scheduling, planning, etc.), and then get mad when I do.
Carry on, Sisters. . . carry on.
Hey, sister Maureen. No, don’t anyone ever say that to me either. That’s right. You tell ‘em, sister. SAS: Socially Acceptably Snarly. I love it. Good to read you here again. Come back soon.
And Roadchick. How great to see you here. Yes, sister Timekeeper, you are only doing your job when you do what’s asked of you. You know it. Let’s carry on together on this.
Here’s my pet peeve: Don’t tell me to set aside some time for myself everyday, especially if you’re going to qualify it by adding: “…even if it’s just 10 or 15 minutes to relax in the bath.” Good grief! I want the whole day not some measly 10 or 15 minutes!
Oh, Sandy, that’s one of mine, as well. Oh, how I hate that one. Good grief is right. Thanks for sharing it, sister. We are always glad to read you here at TSP. Please come back soon.
Corollary of no. 5:
Don’t smile at me unless you mean it.
Don’t tell me you don’t have the time to do all the things I do. We have the same hours in the same day. Just be honest and say you choose to not do the things I do all day.
Hey, Petra. Oh yeah. Like that. Mean it when you smile at me. Yes. For everything else, a mime is fine, but mean it, please, when you smile. Great edit. Thank you. And please come back for more soon.
Tell it, Angela. Tell it to the sisterhood. Oh yeah. Love this growing list so much that I might needlepoint it onto something, pin it to my dress, and wear it all over town. Welcome to TSP, Angela, and please keep coming back for more.
Don’t tell me to hurry up when there is a moment to savor that I might never get to experience again, an opportunity to discover new “first’s” with my little 2 year old nephew, or I decide to be spontaneous and cheer a little louder for the home team.
I love life and, having been given a new lease on it, I feel like I’ve thrown caution into the wind…chucked my bra into the breeze! Ha ha ha….
…and, Anglea…BINGO, sister! You nailed THAT one on the head! I am giving you the high 5 salute from the Pacific Coast!
Hello, Heidi. And welcome to TSP. We are delighted to have your voice here, adding to the wisdom of The Please-Don’ts of the Sisterhood. You bet. That’s a choice one; tender and intelligent. Thanks for sharing it with all of us. And speaking of cheering on the sidelines, do please see us on that subject here. And please come back soon.
I like short a lot. I just don’t do short much…. But…..I’ve got an even shorter “don’t” list:
1. Don’t tell me ANYthing unless I ask you for your opinion/advice first. If I want to know how anybody else thinks I ought to be doing something, I will sure enough ask.
2. Even if I’ve asked for your advice, don’t be mad if I don’t take it. My life, my choices, and I’ll do my durnedest to extend the same courtesies to you.
Hiya, TexasDeb: Oh yeah. Nice. Quick. Pointed. Got it, sister. And adding them on. Come back soon for more.
please don’t tell me how lucky I am to be an only child! Alright-already – I’m spoiled and there’s nothing I can do about it. I don’t feel lucky. And I’m 50! When do I get to be an “only adult” for gosh sakes?
(Oh yes, and don’t tell me I buy too many magazines either!)
Hiya, Karen. We now bestow on you the crown of “only adult.” Oh yeah. It’s definitely time to stop referring to us as any kind of “children.” And enjoy those magazines, sister. In reading we become better writers. Please come back soon.
Don’t ask me what I want for a gift (or what my family wants as gifts) if you already know what you’re going to give me. And if I say “please don’t give me” something, please don’t.
I go thru this with my oldest sister every year and every year it’s the same – I’d like a book by one of my favorite authors, she gets me some statue of a bear. Not even close…
Hi, Robin. And thanks for contributing to our Un-Wonderful Please Don’ts of the Sisterhood. Oh yeah, gifts. That’s a choice topic between sisters, one that Margaret and I have battled ourselves, writing about it here and here. I think there’s a book in that subject, entitled, “Gifts My Sister Gave Me,” that could be brilliant. Thank you for bringing this up, and for visiting. Please come back soon.